It is likely that your therapist will ask you to do homework. She/he might ask you to read books or articles on addiction and/or betrayal trauma. the therapist may have you do journaling, or drawing, or something else. I just want to emphasize how important it is to do these assignments. They are meant to facilitate your recovery and help you process your emotions. The better you are at humbly accepting and doing the assignments given to you the better and faster you will heal. If you drag your feet or act proud in the least little bit, you will only be hurting yourself!
Making the decision to go into therapy brings with it a certain amount of commitment. You are committing to yourself and giving your mind, body, and spirit a clear signal that you think you are worth it. You are also making a committment to your husband that you think he is worth your very best efforts. Likewise he will be showing your, through his commitment to therapy and his recovery that he believes you are worth it. In fact, the commitment level that both of you have to your recovery is the clearest and best proof that you have of the level of commitment you have to each other.
When my Ex and I went to LifeStar, we had a series of workbooks and assignments that we had to hand in to our group leader each week. My heart sank when I would often see that he had not done his homework or that the answers to the questions only had one or two words written down. He was clearly NOT invested in himself, or me. His words showed it, and his actions screamed it. His lack of commitment to me is the greatest reason why we are divorced now. He simply did not care enough about me, or himself, to do the hard work of recovery.
I really do not understand why you would not do this soul saving work with 100% commitment, considering everything that is at stake. Not to mention that these programs are expensive! If you don’t do the work then you are just throwing your money away. I wanted to get my money’s worth. I am sure you do too!
Like they say, ‘Just do it!”
Stay Strong, Be Sweet!
The Cupcake Warrior